Celebrity Apprentice declares creative bankruptcy with new cast?

[HMG Celebrity News] – Do you remember when Bret Michaels won last year’s Celebrity Apprentice, then was found to have a  heart condition? Well, Donald Trump might also need to check this year’s cast for a pulse – The cavalcade of banality includes 70′s teen-idol David Cassidy, La Toya Jackson, Gary Busey, Meat Loaf and John Rich.

Completing this laughable list of D-list wannabes are Atlanta ‘Housewife’ NeNe Leakes, Lisa Rinna, Dionne Warwick, baseball’s Jose Canseco, ‘Survivor’ Richard Hatch, rapper Lil Jon, Mark McGrath, Playboy Playmate Hope Dworaczyk, ‘The View’s Star Jones, model Niki Taylor – and Marlee Matlin is also involved.

Personally I’m so excited by this litany of lameness I can barely retain consciousness. The Donald, of course, does not feel quite the same way;

“The next season of ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ will be the most exciting yet,” he gushes in a statement released this morning by NBC. “We are thrilled to bring back the celebrity format with 16 new and unbelievably talented celebrities who will help me make ‘Apprentice’ one of the hottest shows on television this Spring.”

‘Unbelievably talented celebrities’? Can we therefore assume they gave us the wrong list?

The last season of Apprentice – and from this evidence it should be – raised over $1.2-million for charity, and executive producer Mark Burnett is keen to see that continue.

“I’m thrilled at the return of ‘Celebrity Apprentice,’” he told OMG in a statement. “It’s become America’s Sunday night guilty pleasure, while raising millions for charity. This season is the best yet.”

And the judging panel reads like Monty Python’s ‘Bruce’ sketch, with hair-weaves; Four people will weed out the winners, and every one is called Trump: Donald, Donald’s daughter Ivanka, Donald Jr., and another son for whom dad even turned the page in the ‘Baby Names’ book – Eric Trump.

You could fit the entire fan-base for this show’s cast in a phone booth and still have ample room for a buffet. But if you’re in the mood for some mindless nostalgia the new season opens on March 6th on NBC…