Al Gore sex assault case is dropped

[HMG] – In news that will cause sighs of relief that could dissolve half of the ice caps, CNN is reporting that former Vice President Al Gore will not face prosecution for alleged sexual misconduct.

The allegations, made by professional massage therapist Molly Hagerty, claimed that 62-year old Al made sexual advances during a therapy session at the Hotel Lucia in Portland, Oregon, on October 24, 2006.

The Portland Police, however, have closed their inquiries, citing “a lack of credible evidence,” according to the Multnomah County DA’s staff.

“After evaluating the materials I agree with the assessment that a sustainable criminal case does not exist,” Senior Deputy DA, Don Rees wrote in a memo. “Ms. Hagerty’s detailed statement is insufficient to support a criminal charge given the contradictory evidence, conflicting witness statements, credibility issues and lack of forensic evidence.”

Al’s staff at his office in Nashville, Tennessee promptly released a statement, saying the former VP was pleased with the outcome.

“Mr. Gore unequivocally and emphatically denied this accusation when he first learned of its existence three years ago,” they write. “He respects and appreciates the thorough and professional work of the Portland authorities and is pleased that this matter has now been resolved.”

And the moral of this story is, the only thing less reliable than a tabloid ‘sex scandal’ are the people who sell them…