Eva Longoria cheered on fiance Tony Parker at Game 5 of the Western Conference Finals. It’s cute *choke* how she still brings a camera to his games. Seriously though, check out the bling on her finger…what were we saying?
Pax Thien became the latest official member of the Jolie-Pitt bunch today. He was adopted by Momgelina in Vietnam (while Dad Brad was shooting a “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” here stateside) as a Jolie because Vietnam does not allow unwed parents to adopt together. And we all know what Brangelina think of getting married, right? “Until everybody has the right….”
Congrats, Pax!
Nicole Richie doesn’t mix with cars. She somehow fried her boyfriend’s BMW 745, not long before she scored herself a parking ticket for leaving her ride in a loading zone. That’s why it’s called a loading zone. Then again, she did drive the wrong way on a one-way road not that long ago, so maybe these road signs have no meaning for her…
We thought about sparing you this news about K-Fed, but you come here because you love the pain. Admit it. The overly fertile wannabe rapper was partying this weekend in Las Vegas when he bumped into another inexplicable chick magnet: Wilmer Valderamma. Eyewitnesses say the deluded duo insisted on “rapping together to every song played.” We’ll pause while you groan. He then reportedly invited the Fez to collaborate with him on his next album. Why, oh why, does he insist on “entertaining” us?
Snoop Dogg, with his two pups, is spotted at the Stanley Cup Finals in Anaheim on Wednesday. Why he can’t afford a better fake mustache is beyond us.
In the latest issue of Parade magazine, FHM’s Sexiest Woman in the World gripes about her looks. “Most days I wake up and look in the mirror and go, ‘ugh.’ I don’t really think I look all that great.” Poor thing, she sounds so downtrodden. We’ll get to work immediately on her pity party. Right after Paris becomes gainfully employed.
Speaking of heiresses (actually, this one got screwed out of her inheritance, but anyhoo..): Tori and hubby Dean McDermott stroll about London while in England to promote their reality show (do we really need more?) Tori & Dean: Inn Love. People magazine reports that McDermott’s ex wife has penned her side of the story, which will be included in The Other Woman, an anthology of snubbed womens’ stories. An excerpt of her writing follows:
When Dean called me from the set [of his TV movie], he told me how great he was getting along with his costar Tori Spelling. She was fun, caring and much hotter in real life. I assumed this was good.
Now here he is, back. We’re on vacation and I’m wearing my bikini with saggy faded bottoms. I know something is wrong. “Have you met someone?” I ask. He nods yes. “Is it Tori Spelling?” He nods. “We’re soulmates,” he says. “She loves me unconditionally.”
“What conditions?” I scream. “You’ve only known each other three weeks.”
I look down at my baby daughter. “We just adopted a baby.” The phrase single mother pops up in my brain. I start to feel weightless as I cross the divide between together and alone.
“I’m not leaving the kids,” he says. “I’m leaving you.”
“Inheriting Beauty”, a forthcoming book that’s showcasing the world’s most beautiful heiresses, including Roberta Armani, Dylan Lauren, Allegra Hicks, Nadja Swarovski, and Casey Johnson, has unanimously voted to exclude the wonky-eyed jailbird from its pages. “She’s tried to play society like a game of Three-card Monte. Let’s hear it for high standards,” said Marianne Strong, agent for the celebrity photographer. Thank goodness somebody realizes that she has no actual merits aside from her last name (even though that’s not really a merit)! And no, boys, washing a car while almost completely naked and eating a burger at the same time (remember that commercial?) doesn’t count either.
